I didn't watch the Oscars- in fact, I never watch any of those kinds of things. The closest I get is to look at msn.com's Undressed! pictures and laugh at the things some people think are fashionable (for example: http://movies.msn.com/movies/oscars2006/worstfashion/?photoidx=1).
However, as I was perusing these last few weeks of pictures, I started pondering another type of award: The Laziest Mom of the Year Award! I had been slipping up lately and was almost out of the running, but this month I have found myself as a serious contender again. Every now and then I do a few things that count against me toward earning this honor, but for the most part I just keep tallying up the score!
This one probably counted against me- Wyatt got a HUGE teddy bear for Valentine's Day. He'll be moving to his own room soon, so I wanted him to have a friend to take with him clear to the other end of the house. I worked the night before, so I got home in the morning, woke him up, and put this gigantic bear in his crib. At first he wasn't so sure...
...checking him out up close...
...yeah, I guess I like him.
He kept calling him Baby Bear. That made me laugh.
Some moms give their kids trendy clothes and fun, educational toys. My kids get whatever they can find. He's wearing Jana's headband like a necklace, and playing with a flashlight. He seemed to be enjoying himself, at least.
I'm not sure how this one goes. At least he's learning to economize space- why have a food bowl and a water bowl when you can combine them ALL in to one? (Maybe because the dog won't eat soggy water-logged kibbles?)
He woke up from his nap and I came in to find he organized his crib while he was waiting for me. I guess my chances of this prestigious award go down when you consider that the kid sings the Clean-up Song even when Mom's not around. Although sometimes I hear it like this:
Clean-up! Clean up! (*whump*) Everybody (*whump*) everywhere!
Clean-up! (*whump*) Clean-up! Everybody do your (*whump*) share!
This version means he's cleaned up the crib by throwing everything out of it.
This day really boosted my chances. My kids were playing in the front room while I went to read the beginning of Midnight Sun again. It got really quiet (this strikes terror into the heart of a mom), so I went to see what they were doing. Jana passed out on the floor-
-and Wyatt turned the swing on, climbed in, and went to sleep. Only the best of the lazy moms can get their kids to nap without any direction from the parent! Woo hoo!
A few days later. I bought them cute matching headrest pillows for Christmas, but Wyatt seems to prefer a blankie and Mickey in the laundry basket. Another remarkable point in my favor is that my 4 month-old totally watches tv. I didn't even think she could see the screen from more than a few feet yet. I think I'm winning!
I told Wyatt to go get in his highchair. I guess he thought I wouldn't notice the difference. Does it count against my earning my award that I did in fact notice it wasn't Wyatt?
Wyatt loves PB&J, but we only have it when I'm feeling up to cleaning it up afterwards. Just the best of us lazy moms dictate the menu by whether we want to clean. Go, Melody!
This has nothing to do with anything. I just wanted a picture of Skeeter. He got his teeth brushed with his favorite chicken-flavored dog toothpaste.
Do you think she knows it's not her mom playing with her but instead a plastic pumpkin bucket?
I hope you caught the tongue-in-cheek tenor of my posting. While I am kind of hard on myself sometimes, I also know it's foolish to try and make myself run faster than I have strength, or expect to be perfect all the time. The best I can do is try to be perfect sometimes and even if I never quite get it right, I am confident that I would still be a shoo-in for the Mom Who Loves Her Family More Than Anything award!
9 months ago